June 23, 2014

We didn't start the day out mullet hunting...

The plan was for the kids and me to drive to Panama City and pick my husband up at the airport for a conference.

We were about 30 miles out from the airport,
 in the middle of nowhere when...
Really? So, I get fancy with my husbands two year old vehicle's gadgets and search for the closest Automotive Center. It was only 4.7 miles away, the other way. And I was watching it get further away, 4.9, 5.1, 5.3, 5.5, 5.7 miles.... hmmm... turn around or push forward and see what happens.

After some praying and a couple minutes of driving, 
fighting flashbacks from college when I had a loser of a car,
maybe some cussing (not in the same breath) 

I see this glorious place. 
I pull around to the back as instructed by the sign on the door and a  nice gentlemen walks up.  I ask, "Do you work here?" Great first line, did I mention we were in the middle of nowhere? The helpful man thinks its the radiator cap, and fills the car with water and says I should head to the dealership 22 miles away, near our destination.  He explains it's clearly under warranty.

Meanwhile, I am scoping out the place for a getaway, grabbing a pen in the car for a weapon, realizing my cell phone has NO SERVICE and no one knows I am here and my kids are in the car.  

Then I give him a small tip and get his business card because I realize if I breakdown, he will be the one to save us.  We begin the trek to the dealership and get a hold of my husband on my oldest child's $9.99/month trac fone. It's working great. Just great.

My husband grabs a cab and tells me to call the company vehicle maintenance people. I'm instructed to "Pull over immediately", and a tow truck will come get us. After driving 38 MPH with the flashers on with people angrily passing, this is a welcome thought. We pull into a shut down diner, however there is a lovely Subway right across the street. 

My husband arrives, and we play pong with cars to cross the four lane highway to Subway. I have seen women in strollers do this in the big city, so I've got this....right?

Did I mention the Subway is inside the convenience store. I mean, that is convenient.
We make ourselves at home while he handles arrangements. 

Dog food, water, and pepsi!
I was relieved when a friend agreed  to come get us while my husband went with the tow truck, because "we were out of our element in this part of town". Wait....what?

Over the next hour, I had a lovely conversation with a local who said we needed to be careful we don't get over charged from the mechanic. You see, that happened to him in Kentucky. Then the Subway worker's son came in and they asked how his leg was after the chain saw "accident". He said that was nothing after the machete injury to his arm. Everyone decided he should really be more careful.

They even had a great place to charge my cell phone. 

And then wobbly guy came in who looked at my oldest one to many times. I initially thought he was special  and ignored it, then I decided he was especially drunk and maybe a little special. But if you look at my kid to many times, I don't really care what you have going on because the crazy in me will come out. He successfully got his sandwich while carefully holding steady on the counter. He then walked slowly up to the convenience store cashier, and gave her a hug, smelling her hair for a few moments. He tells her, "Your hair smells reeeaalll nice." 

Thankfully, our friend showed up immediately after that. 

So, after ALL that excitement, what do my kids say?

"Mom, did that cashier have a mullet?" 

Later that night, we let the kids watch the TV version of Joe Dirt with their friends. I figured after everything else they had seen that day, it should be the least of my worries. 

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