"Well, look how great you turned out Mom. So I don't think I should really feel that bad."
I calmly said, "Look, I am tired of telling you how to you should act. You have a choice in life, to be one of these people in this category" (insert me pointing to imaginary Group A), "OR you can be one of these people over here." (Imaginary Group B.) "This group cares about other peoples feelings, and this other group cares what other people think. I have a feeling if this happened at church, you would have handled it differently. But you chose to fall under peer pressure and handle it like the rest of the group. I am not going to tell you what group to be in, that is your choice. I know what group I would like you to be in, and what group God would like you to be in. But you need to make a decision which group it is, and your everyday actions should match whatever group you choose to be in. I am going to leave the room now and give you time to think about it." Me pointing. "This group here or this one over here."